Surgeon General’s Warning: This post contains entirely too much sarcasm and attitude. Proceed at your own risk.
If you’ve been to Costco lately you know Christmas is near. Nevermind Halloween, Thanksgiving, and whatever else in between … gift giving season is already here.
A lot of people ask, “Roy, you are wise, and creative, and thoughtful . . . what makes a great Christmas present?”
It’s exactly the kind of question a 60-something chubby bald white guy who grew up working in a junkyard is qualified to answer.
So here are my top ten Christmas gift ideas:
- If haircare is as important to you as it is to me, you only want the very best hairbrush. You want a brush so soft you actually look forward to using it. It’s like a daily massage. Oh sure, it’s pricey. But you’re worth it. I mean, the person you are giving this to is worth it.
- Is grandparenting new in your life the way it is for me? Well, being a new grandparent is the perfect time to go completely bonkers with gifts. I suggest the Farm Tractor Playground Plan, a modest life-size outdoor play area for kids. It comes completely unassembled and without materials – think of the fun! Um, yeah, so basically you just get the plans. But how cool this will be in your backyard! Click here to order this very affordable $55 gift.
- Let’s get back to basics, shall we? Everyone loves olive oil, and the best olive oil on the planet is D’Oliva. I’m a completely unbiased judge. Order yours today at this link.
- Maybe the recent election has upset someone you know. They are fed up with America and shopping for a new country. How about Scotland? The weather is always sunny, they speak English (sorta), the whiskey is good, and they have a long history of welcoming outsiders (often with swords and javelins but I digress). So buy them a Scottish island! It even has a pub!
- Tired of waxy chocolate Advent calendars? Change up your routine and celebrate Advent with an incredible book of devotions (less fattening and won’t melt in your hands). The author is smart, insightful, spiritually mature, and handsome. I could go on but he’d be embarrassed. Here’s the link.
- Nothing says “I love you” like a Weight Watcher’s Gift Card. It shouts, “I care for you, your health, your heart, and I’m really sick of that spare tire.” Spring for the full $1000 option to really express how important this is to you.
- If you travel with a variety of electronic gadgets, and each seems to take a different power cord, then you definitely need one of these multi-charging cables. I took this on a recent trip and loved it. And everyone I showed it too ordered their own!
So there you go, my top seven gift ideas. Enjoy!
Picture taken by my sister the year she gave me a tacky Christmas suit. We always exchange tacky gifts. The year she gave me spray on hair was the year I gave her a thigh master. We have a creative approach to giving.