A recent interaction with a church goer left me discouraged. The conversation with this person wasn’t negative or cynical. I mean no disrespect to the person if they read this post.
But it did leave me discouraged and saddened.
Not because I disagreed with the person. We had things to disagree about of course, but we had more things in agreement.
What saddened me, frustrated me, left me a bit cold, was this persons absolute commitment to a fixed theology. There was no room for other points of view. He wasn’t pushy about it, but it was clear that if you didn’t pass certain theological tests, you just weren’t in the club. He had worked out the puzzle, down to the last piece.
I kept wondering where this absolutism, this certainty, came from.
After talking with him a bit more it struck me. It comes from fear. Each point on a theological chart has to be checked. If they aren’t checked, the whole system comes apart and that leads to chaos. There is no room for error. In this system, uncertainty feels like doubt, which is scary. One missing piece means everything else is incomplete.
It struck me how ungracious this approach can feel to one who isn’t in the club. It also struck me how being so adamant requires one to set aside humility for the false promise of certainty. Below the surface, I sensed this guy was simply exhausted by it all.
Obviously there are some things I consider absolutes. But there are things we simply do not know.
The chapter on love, 1 Corinthians 13, has a fascinating ending. Verses 12-13 says, “Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror, then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.”
We only know in part.
This is comforting to me. I have a lot of questions, and formulaic systems meant to answer those questions are often lacking. So it allows me to breathe a bit easier by admitting I don’t know it all. I don’t have to insist on a one-size-fits-all theology.
Read a bit further and the passage says, “Follow the way of love….”
That seems a lot healthier, and less stressful, than making sure all the puzzle pieces are in place.