A few years ago I wrote this story, but it feels even more relevant today. Maybe because it’s an election year, or maybe because we have our own “alternative facts” to believe. Whatever the reason, it feels like we are hearing more lies than ever before.
One reality of this, as this story points out, is that someone who lies to you is just as likely to steal from you.
This story happened on a hot summer afternoon in the mid-1970’s. I was with my dad as he was negotiating a deal with a contractor. Let’s call the contractor John. The negotiations were bumpy but still civil and respectful.
Suddenly my father let out a deep sigh and said, “Well, John, it doesn’t look like we can make a deal today.” Without another word my father stood up, shook John’s hand, and turned toward the door. It was abrupt and a shock to both me and John. Despite John’s asking to still work something out, my dad shook his head and walked out of the office with me following.
Once we got in the car, I asked Dad what had just happened. I was confused because nothing in the conversations with John surprised me, much less made me think John was lying.
My father said something that has stuck with me the rest of my life. “You can’t trust a person who lies. If they lie to you, they will steal from you.”
Apparently John said something that was clearly a lie. I was clueless because I had never met John before this conversation. But something John said was a lie, and Dad knew it.
So Dad walked out. He wasn’t going to hire a contractor who lied.
What struck me about this was my dad connecting the liar with a thief. “You can’t trust a person who lies. If they lie to you, they will steal from you.”
Stealing was a constant problem in the wrecking yard and on a construction sites. So Dad was especially sensitive to it.
Dad grew up by the code of the old west – your word was your bond, and horse thieves were the lowest of the low. He knew not to get into a business contract with a liar because they would eventually steal from you.
Lying and stealing all boil down to one fault: a lack of integrity.
Integrity must be the foundation of relationships, partnerships, and all business transactions. We all make mistakes of course. But when a consistent pattern of lying is seen, you can probably expect that person to steal from you eventually.
It’s a good lesson to remember.